Friday, October 31, 2008

Open-hearted Sadness.....

It's been a sad couple of days around here for me...... let's see if I can explain. .....

I live in a neighborhood that some would think of as "unsafe". I have lived here in my apartment for almost 12 years now. I have watched as people have come and gone, and the lack of care that goes into this place.

Well, a couple of years ago, after Hurricane Wilma ( I think) three adult siblings moved in next door. They lost there home in the storm. We became friends instantly. They were super nice people, and it was nice to have neighbors that I could talk to. We would see them a couple of times a week and often would stand outside talking after they got home from work. We looked out for each other.

My disability, makes it hard for me to be social on most occasions. Brenda, Donna, and Bruce were really easy to talk to though. They always had a smile for me and Lana (my dog) anytime they saw us. It gave me a sense of home, and goodness in the world. Not everyone was mean and nasty ya know?

Wednesday morning, Brenda knocks on my door.... and tells me that her sister Donna passed away that morning. It shocked me to my core. I had just seen her on Monday. We were standing outside like usual, chatting away. No indication that anything was wrong. It scared the crap out of me. Donna was 52 years old. She was so funny and sweet. My heart broke for her family, her siblings and the trauma that her sister Brenda must have been going through trying to save her.

I'm a fairly compassionate person. I didn't know what to do. I wrapped my arms around Brenda and assured her that we would pray for her family, to help them through this time. I offered whatever we had for comfort...(which is not a lot). They don't know what happened, they are still in shock.

After Brenda left, I had a panic attack...full blown. My fear of being alone, and dying, rushing to the fore of my mind.... Sucks having this wacky disabilty. I hope that I can be a good friend to Brenda and Bruce during this time. I told them they were welcome in my home just to sit and talk anytime they wanted. I feel for them so much. It's a sad thing.

What I noticed though is our other neighbors..... Richie, the firefighter on the 2nd floor hadx heard the 911 call on his radio as he was leaving for work. He felt awful too. The paramedics were already here, there was nothing they or he could do. I am surrounded by people with families, with lives and all of their own things going on. I'm amazed at the compassion that is expressed from relative strangers.

Sometimes people aren't so bad. Sometimes they suprise you. I have been sad, but glad that I am able to share some kindness with people going through a tragedy. Or just in need of a hug.

It's opened my eyes, a bit more to the world at large. Appreciate the people in your life, tell them everyday how much you care for them. You never know when it's just what someone needs to hear......

Thank you guys for checking in here. I know I'm not too consistent...(I have issues! lol) but I really enjoy hearing from those of you who stop by. If you do, just drop me a's cool.

Take care on this Halloween! Be safe.....


Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Prayerful Chillin

Just stretchin my creative muscles. I hope you all are well. Make sure you remember to vote! Whomever you vote for, just make sure to use your right to do it!
Peace ya'll!!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Blow Me a Kiss

Random Sketch


Ok, so sometimes I just wakeup on the wrong side of life. My hair sticks up in all directions, I feel empty inside and my feet just don't want to cooperate. What's up with that? Seriously?

Lately I've been feeling like the neighborhood watchdog. I've turned into my old lady neighbor from 25 years ago. Eyeballin the kids hanging around in the stairwell, break stuff in the building. It's frustrating for me. I've lived her nearly 12 years and I've watched this place just go to shit.

I'm annoyed because I can't work, because of my stupid "problem". It doesn't seem to get better as quickly as I want it to. My brain does loops around the airport with no apparent landing pattern. I try to follow my train of thought, but manage to always jump the tracks. My creativity is stifled and my girl is the best thing on the PLANET. I worry that she won't always be happy with me being the housewife. It's so hard on her. We've got too many bills and not enough money ya know?

I'm babbling I know, it's one of my coping skills. Stream of consciousness writing.

I wanted to try and sketch again but I put too much pressure on myself for it to be perfect. I want to paint, but can't seem to get the brush to work in my hand. I need to focus but..... damn...I get so distracted by the oddest things.

I miss reading the blogs that I follow and try to catch up. I go outside and my dog is happy but she's hot and confused by my lack of enthusiasm. Sure, it could be the "female" troubles, it seems to always be worse around that time. I feel like I disappoint everyone and yet they still love me for some reason.

UGH!! Patooey....just getting stuff out of my head......I can't believe you made it this far. Thanks for listening...there's a special doodle in the mail for ya if you send me your snailmail addy!!

Peace ya'll!

Tuesday, October 07, 2008


How many zeros in a billion?

This is too true to be funny.

The next time you hear a politician use the
word 'billion' in a casual manner, think about
whether you want the 'politicians' spending
YOUR tax money.

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend,
but one advertising agency did a good job of
putting that figure into some perspective in
one of it's releases.

A billion seconds ago it was 1959.

A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.

A billion hours ago our ancestors were
living in the Stone Age.

A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.

A billion dollars ago was only
8 hours and 20 minutes,
at the rate our government
is spending it.

While this thought is still fresh in our brain...
let's take a look at New Orleans ....
It's amazing what you can learn with some simple division.

Louisiana Senator,
Mary Landrieu (D)
is presently asking Congress for
to rebuild New Orleans . Interesting number...
what does it mean?

Well... if you are one of the 484,674 residents of New Orleans
(every man, woman, and child)
you each get $516,528.

Or... if you have one of the 188,251 homes in
New Orleans , your home gets $1,329,787.

Or... if you are a family of four...
your family gets $2,066,012

Washington, D. C

Are all your calculators broken??

Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL License Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel Permit Tax
Gasoline Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Inventory Tax
IRS Interest Charges (tax on top of tax)
IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
L iquor Tax
Luxury Tax
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road Usage Tax (Truckers)
Sales Taxes
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Tele phone Federal Excise Tax
Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Tax
Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
Telephone State and Local Tax
Telephone Usage Charge Tax
Utility Tax
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft Registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax


Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago...
and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.

We had absolutely no national debt...
We had the largest middle class in the world...
and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.

What happened?
Can you spell 'politicians!'

And I still have to
press '1'
for English?

What the heck happened?????

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Sarah Sarah.....((ugh!))

Sometimes I just have to shake my head....seriously what is wrong with her??? Don't forget to watch the debate tonight!!!! It should be good comedy.